Are you a student?

I don't know about you, but I loved school.  I learned new things, did the work of school, and got rewards in the form of good grades.  I enjoyed school and I was good at it.  It worked for me.  I learned how to play the game of school, and I could win that game.  I don't know that it translates to much in the real world, but it mattered a lot to me at the time.  It felt like I was achieving something.  And, being good at something is enjoyable, I won't lie.  Since then, I've worked in a preschool and a Middle School.  Perhaps I'm looking to reinvent the positive feelings I have for school, but I'm here to tell you it doesn't work that way.

When was the last time you let yourself be a student?  I'm not talking about actually enrolling in school again.  I mean when was the last time you put yourself in the position to learn something new, to be a beginner, to return to your Kindergarten self.  As soon as we start at the beginning, the pressure is off.  No one expects us to be experts anymore.  Mistakes and failures are acceptable again, even normal.  I don't know about you, but in adulthood, I feel like I'm supposed to have my crap figured out.  I'm supposed to know what I'm doing and how to do it.  But what if we let ourselves return to learning mode.  Instantly when I try something new, I am humble.  I feel like I can ask for help, ask questions, open myself up to what others can offer me...I can open myself to change without concern for what people will think of me, most of all, myself.  When I humble myself, I actually find that most people are more willing to help me.  They become the Kindergarten teacher, understanding and kind, accepting of my mistakes, and ready to show me where my seat is over and over again. 

When I allow myself to begin, I allow grace back into my life.  I don't expect perfection.  I don't expect competence.  I expect only to try with mistakes and practice a lot.  It's refreshing to put away the bar that is always set so stinking high, especially in our own minds.  There is joy in the attempt when acting as a beginner.  Possibilities abound and there are no limits.  There is nothing to lose and everything to gain.  Sounds refreshing, doesn't it? 

It's only in our willingness to allow ourselves not to know, that we can grow and learn and be truly present in our own minds.  Why not allow yourself the awkwardness and discomfort of becoming a student?  Even harder, do it with no goal in mind.  Learn for the sake of learning, for the sake of putting yourself out of your comfort zone, for the sake of awakening a childlike curiosity.  Maybe you'll discover you hate it or love it, but it really doesn't matter.  It's the process of discovering that creates wonder and excitement. 

Sometimes the best place to start is right at the beginning!

In the beginner’s mind, there are many possibilities. In the expert’s mind, there are few.

 —Shunryu Suzuki